- When I’ve made a mistake, and others too, how do I behave without blaming the others and without always blaming myself?
Pedro de Souza: It’s not your responsibility to point your mistakes out to others. Rely on God. God helps all to learn. You don’t have to assume that responsibility.
- But what about when you’re affected by others’ mistakes?
Pedro de Souza: Communicate lovingly and wisely with them. That’s what Christ said. Develop a Christ-Consciousness.
- Christ said on the cross, “Father, forgive those who know not what they do.” When I remember this sentence in the moment I’m hurt, then I gain the courage to forgive in time. It doesn’t always work, but it’s growing.
Pedro de Souza: Yes, not always. But you can try. That’s the miracle.
- I’ve forgiven and have closure on the matter. But when it continues . . .?
Pedro de Souza: If you have a Christ-Consciousness, then you’ll forgive again and again. Christ said you should forgive your brother seven times seventy times. How often have you had to forgive your boss? But only in this way do you reach a Christ-Consciousness. Not when you continue to give others the responsibility.
- I forgive someone and at the same time I’m thinking, “I’ve continued to forgive you for six months already, and you still haven’t changed a bit.”
Pedro de Souza: That isn’t forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean trying to change the other person. It means accepting him as he is and seeing him as a child of God—despite his weaknesses. Just don’t count his thorns! Pay attention to his merits. Everyone, too, has merits! Many of them!
- If I always act as if no mistake has been made, does that mean I shouldn’t even identify the mistake? But it is something. If he’s hurt someone, then he really has hurt someone.
Pedro de Souza: Yes, you can judge him for yourself, but not sentence him.
- But can’t you stop the person when what he does continues to affect another again and again?
Pedro de Souza: It doesn’t affect you. The miracle means that you see things differently. And seeing is interpreting.
- But the problem is that the other’s wrong view can genuinely influence my life, that it affects me in a negative way, that I, for example, don’t get a job . . .. I can, of course, forgive him as a human being, but I suffer from his actions.
Pedro de Souza: If you can’t come to terms with the situation and negative feelings develop, then try to stay out of his way when possible.
- But when you can’t prevent that another or I is hurt by a wrong action, and you have to cope with this suffering! You just have to do something!
Pedro de Souza: You can be a model by your virtues. You can radiate the good values yourself. When you’ve done that, then a lot has changed already. Pay attention to your thoughts and fill them with friendly contents. – You should help others, but to know how you need a high conscious, that means many experiences and understanding of the situation—and, of course, a big heart.
- But do you have to watch someone hurting another?
Pedro de Souza: We don’t have to watch the suffering, but heighten the person’s conscious. A person with a high consciousness doesn’t hurt another.
But begin with yourself.